Pawshion Police: Designer Purses and Fairy Tale Princesses Edition


Izzy: Greetings all you designer purses and fairy tale princesses.

Elsa: On the surface, these two things have nothing to do with each other, but something tells me…

Izzy: That your exceedingly brilliant and creative friend has found the missing link?

Elsa: I don’t think you know what The Missing Link is…

Izzy: A missing link, then.

Elsa: Okay, enlighten me, ole wise lady.

Izzy: I’m not old!!!!!

Elsa: You’re not wise either.

Izzy: Up yours. I’ll give you a hint…

Elsa: Up yours? Apparently not a lady either.

Izzy: What do Coach purses and Cinderella have in common?

Elsa: Oh, I don’t know…nothing.

Izzy: Only for you non-creative types.

Elsa: Again. Enlighten me.

Izzy: Coach…Cinderella…Coach…ella…Coachella.

Elsa: WOW…now that was a stretch.

Izzy: Nope.

Elsa: Well, I suppose that Coachella couples wear designer clothing with the fantasy and whimsy of a fairy tale.

Izzy: Okay. Umm…sure…If you are looking for some REAL connection. Don’t you see?? The word “Coach” is scrunched together with the last part of Cinderella.. you know, the “ella” part??

Elsa: Yes. I see that. But I was trying to look for a more concrete and deeper…never mind.

Izzy: I’m deep!

Elsa: As a puddle on the sun.

Izzy: To reiterate…up yours.

Elsa: Enough of your nonsense…

Izzy: Non-Sense??? NON-SENSE!!  More like omni-sense!!

Elsa: Making up new words now too. So, we are talking about Coachella. Let’s explain a little about it for those who don’t know.  What would you tell people who haven’t been to Coachella?

Izzy: You’re a nerd?

Elsa: No. Most people have not been to the music festival, Coachella, and we can’t really call the majority of our audience nerds. Besides, the question I was really asking was how would you explain Coachella fashions to someone who isn’t familiar with it.

Izzy: Ohhhhhhhhh

Elsa: Hippy chic?

Izzy: Bohemian rhapsody.

Elsa: That’s a song, not a fashion style.

Izzy: It’s descriptive though.

Elsa: Coachella is a music festival that attracts the worlds young, beautiful, famous and fashionable. And the styles that are worn at Coachella set the tone for many fashion trends.

Izzy: So, let’s take a look at an example?



Elsa: That is the perfect way to start the show!

Izzy: Start?  You’ve been rambling on forever…

Elsa: But this is our first guest! And it’s a doozy! And you’re the one who is rambling.

Izzy: She does look quite dreamy.

Elsa: She has the lacy top, the round-framed glasses, the floral headband… and the natural flowing hair.

Izzy: Poster child for Coachella!!

Elsa: Yes, this outfit really does epitomize the event. They say that a picture is worth a thousand words!

Izzy: I need to start taking more pictures then! Maybe I will get you to shut up!

Elsa: Moving on…



Izzy: I love this look! Indiana Jones meets the Village People. Or just really one of the Village people.

Elsa: I know you so well and I am not even sure what you are referring to, but I will say that this is a pretty amazing outfit.

Izzy: The hat is not only stylish but practical too.

Elsa: Yes! The sun can be very hot at Coachella so sunscreen and hats are a great way to protect your eyes and skin.

Izzy: This hat is also great if you want to hide from ex-lovers, paparazzi, or from being seen with you. It’s oversized and can just slide right on over your face.

Elsa: So…it’s practical for more than one use, apparently.

Izzy: The earrings are uber too.

Elsa: They have that southwest or native feel about them…which is so popular in Coachella fashions.

Izzy: I like the necklace too. The shapes and the colors…Gigi looks ALMOST as good as I do. Not quite, though.

Elsa: The denim vest with the distressed sleeves are very bohemian and very in-style.

Izzy: No response about how I look better than Gigi?

Elsa: None that I’m willing to allow out of my mouth.

Izzy: You’re not saying nasty things…now that’s a first.

Elsa: That should be my line.

Izzy: Hey! What do you mean I’m NOT saying nasty things?? That’s so offensive!

Elsa: This next look is a little different than what we normally feature.



Elsa: I LOVE the rich colors of the headband.

Izzy: She’s naked. You commented on her headband and ignore the fact that she is naked?

Elsa: I thought I’d leave that observation to you. Any other comments?

Izzy: Well, for starters…she’s naked.

Elsa: You do realize that dogs are not OBLIGATED to wear clothing, don’t you?

Izzy: I’m fine with being naked. I’m fine with others being naked.

Elsa: So, the headband.

Izzy: You mean the headband on the naked lady?

Elsa: Yes. I mean the headband with such interesting colors. I wonder what types of feathers those are?

Izzy: I thought friends weren’t supposed to wear friends??? Isn’t that what you always preach??

Elsa: Birds lose their feathers naturally, idiot.

Izzy: So much for you not saying nasty things.

Elsa: Getting back to the FASHION since this is a FASHION show…

Izzy: I do love the feathers though. The colors are great. And the necklace is just chunky enough to be glorious without weighing her down too much.

Elsa: Beautiful look for Coachella or any fun summertime concert.

Izzy: Plus, she’s naked.

Elsa: Yes…there’s that too.



Izzy:: Opposite of naked.

Elsa: Opposite of fashion.

Izzy: Let’s just stare at this outfit for a minute and see if we can figure it out.

Elsa: I can’t. It hurts my eyes.

Izzy: If she got lei’d in this outfit, surely our last guest will have no problem…especially since she is already naked.

Elsa: Another helpful observation.

Izzy: Okay, I see Hawaii…

Elsa: I see cat.

Izzy: Maybe flower girl cat?

Elsa: I see ballet dancer.

Izzy: I see Tom Cruise…

Elsa: WHERE!!!!!!! ?????

Izzy: The sunglasses, stupid.

Elsa: That wasn’t very nice.

Izzy: I wasn’t trying to be nice. Anyway, the glasses are very “Top Gun.”

Elsa: The tank top…Miami Vice.

Izzy: If Crockett and Tubbs played volleyball.

Elsa: And last but not least, the handkerchief.

Izzy: A cowboy fold with a tropical pattern.

Elsa: There is no unifying color, pattern, theme or style here.

Izzy: There isn’t even a unifying season here.

Elsa: Do you think that we need to explain to our viewers why this outfit doesn’t work?

Izzy: You always get on my case for insulting our viewers…

Elsa: That was actually a joke.

Izzy: You’re so bad at delivering them that I have no idea when you’re kidding.

Elsa: Don’t blame me if you’re not smart enough to catch on to my clever musings.

Izzy: Maybe I’ll just be too stupid to find my way to Fuku’s to buy you a fried chicken sandwich at Coachella.

Elsa: You know I love you.

Izzy: I know you love fried chicken.

Elsa: Can’t I love both?

Izzy and Elsa: Stay fabulous, fashionistas!

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Izzy the Frenchie

Izzy the Frenchie has become a well-known voice in canine fashion. She gained instant fame when her "bath" video was aired on NBC's Today Show, NBC News with Lester Holt, CBS, ABC, Right this Minute | The Viral Videos Show and the Channel 9 News in Australia. She divides her time between Washington, DC, New York City and the Hamptons.

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